“You don’t have to give up to let go.” ~ Deadmau5, featuring Kaskade, “I Remember.”
Fam, apologies, I’ve been slipping as your Begin Coach.
My goal for It’s Tuesday was to focus my posts on productivity and share tools and home-grown advice to hopefully motivate and inspire you to take those often frightening first steps towards manifesting your dreams.
Out of the six days, I had no idea that Tuesday would be one of the most challenging for me to write. But then again, the entire learning curve experience of producing a daily blog has been a huge lesson in great expectations.
As an overachiever, great expectations have been known to get me into trouble a time or two. Now, I’m not talking about trouble in jail. But trouble with myself. A troubled mind. A troubled heart.
The definition pretty much sums it up. Expectation, so says my MacBook Pro dictionary, is a strong belief that something will happen in the future. In other words, if you expect something will happen, then you pull yourself out of the present. No longer living in the moment, you, in essence, become a bootleg fortune-teller. And you find yourself projecting a future that — let’s face it — may never be.
Over the weekend, I gleaned three life lessons on how to deal with great expectations. The first was Viola Davis losing the Best Actress Oscar to Meryl Streep. Everyone, even Meryl, expected her to win. I mean, Viola was sitting on the front row for God sakes! But instead it was Meryl who took the stage.
Was Viola disappointed? Surely. Did she have great expectations that she would win? Are you freaking kidding me? With all the hype surrounding The Help and her Oscar deserving performance, how could she not succumb to the belief that she would walk away with Oscar?
My next great expectations lesson came from Danica Patrick. Only the 16th woman to race at NASCAR’s highest level, the pressure on this woman to perform on Sunday was off the charts. After two crashes in preliminary rounds and the first ever race postponement due to rain, Danica completed only two rounds before crashing.
Was Danica disappointed? Absolutely. Did she have great expectations that she would place, dare I say win? Trust! With cars racing around that track at 200 plus miles per hour, Danica not only had to believe she could win, but that woman needed to have the biggest balls in the old boys club!
Both Danica and Viola, I’m sure, shed some tears last night. Yet in public, they’ve been gracious and optimistic about their losses.
My biggest great expectations lesson, though, didn’t come from either one of them. It was Christopher Plummer – the oldest thespian to receive an Oscar. His acceptance speech, though humorous, isn’t what struck me. It was the fact that he is 82 and long free of the great expectation to receive an Oscar, he has spent over 50 years building such an impressive career and body of work.
The work, Fam. That’s all you can really do. Awards, accolades and recognition, no doubt, are deserving. But you can’t expect it. Because expectations, especially great ones that fail to materialize when and how you hope they will can metastasize into a dream deferred if you’re not careful.
Am I telling you not to dream or strive for goals? Come on, Make Believers does that even sound like me?
Fam, I’m simply telling you to live in the here and now.
And let go of your expectations of what will happen next.
You can’t control it anyway. So, why suffer?
Fam, how has letting go of expectations freed you?